Tuesday, February 20, 2007

& im getting more and more convinced.

lalala. today's the last day of the new year holidays already. yesterday went out to bai nian for one whole day and it was really tiring. ate alot too and oh my tian i think i'll get overweight soon HAHA.

loads of photos again.. but shall upload it next time cos im too lazy now.

i realised something.
i realised that im scared to think about those times i studied for prelims and olevels. maybe because that period of time was really stressful i had to shut myself in the room and bury myself under notes and books. shut myself off the nice television shows(like jin san shun & goong), camped in macs to mug. and the worse thing- chickenpox. fighting against olevels at the same time and i had to be isolated in the room all by myself. those were the days.. i forced myself to study no matter how. haiz. although its all over and ive already gotten my results, when i think about all these, it somehow sends me jitters and a really weird feeling that i cant describe. and it has become a bad memory, dont know why :( and i don dare to think about them. i think im having some weird problem. haha. maybe im sick of studying then, or maybe im afraid of being afraid of my studies and results. or maybe.. i donno.

i dont know why it has already become
a scar in my heart that
i don wna think about.
or perhaps im just running away.

im afraid to turn back and see how it used to be
and how it no longer is the same.
thankyou, for all that you'd done,
though i know you're not looking anymore.

i think i know it now.

-no self-pity, PLEASE.